LO4: Editing the Script

Hi Caitlin,

Here is feedback from your script. If you need me to elaborate on any of the answers feel free to drop me a message.

1) Do you think we covered enough news topics to keep the viewer intrested?

I do, I really enjoyed the fact that all 3 topics were different and also gaming related.


2) Did the new script balance well for both the presenters equally?

Yes I felt that it was balanced well between both presenters.

3) Was the gaming news relevent  for the show and was it suitable for the target audience and genre?

I felt all of the topics covered were relevent and is suited to all types of gamers and also is applicable to other audiences.

4) Do you think the news we mentioned was spread out enough to cover a few different areas of the gaming genre?

I really liked the topics that were picked you didn't just stick with releases or events it was mixed up well enough and covered enough to fill the slot for the show, however if you want to add more to it, think about covering a local event/development.

5) Do we need to make any improvements to the layout, text or dialoge?

The layout of the script is fine however, I would say to avoid putting in too many scenes of us laughing/asking each other questions as it takes away the 'news' feel of the segment.

Once those changes have been made I think it will be a great script. 

From Vickys Feedback above I have edited the script in the following ways.. 

In yellow I have highlighted the parts of the script where I have removed Vicky and Jordan laughing in the hope to keep the script sounding like a professional news script.

I have also added onto the end of the script a local project that is happening in Sheffield. Although this isn't a project or event that anyone can get involved with the audience may be interested to see how this project will turn out as it is with young creative people.